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Some children just haven't read the parenting books. The harder you try, the worse it gets.

There's a hidden contract at the heart of parenting: that if parents just get it right, their children can be made to do what they want. Manuals explain how to make it very clear to your children what you want them to do and how to respond when they don't cooperate, using rewards and consequences like Time Out, the Naughty Step, or grounding and withdrawing screen privileges.

But every so often, along comes a child who hasn't signed the contract. They don't buy in. When they are put on the Naughty Step, they refuse point blank to stay there. Promises of stickers and rewards get you nowhere at all. Take their iPad away and they say, 'Fine, but I'm still not doing that'. These are the children who rip up the rule book. The firmer the boundaries, the worse their behaviour becomes. Things can go downhill fast, leaving parents floundering.

This down-to-earth, illustrated guide is for parents who need something different. It's for those who are fighting battles where they didn't know battles could be fought. It's for those who suspect that what they are doing isn't helping - but they don't know what else to do. It's for families who need a better way to live and who want their children (and themselves) to thrive.

Dr Naomi Fisher is a clinical psychologist who specialises in trauma, autism and alternative education. She is the mother of two and the author of several books on psychology, education and mental health including the word of mouth sensation Changing Our Minds. Eliza Fricker is The Sunday Times bestselling author and illustrator of Can't Not Won't as well as The Family Experience of PDA. She runs a successful illustrated blog about her experiences with her daughter's school attendance struggles (missingthemark. co. uk).